Gander RV 400 Gambling/ Fantasy Picks

May/5/2019

Who can survive the concrete jungle and become victorious at the Monster Mile? With new track records being set it is bound to be both a fast and exciting race but also has potential to be a battle of attrition. One car spins and the straightaway becomes a pinball machine spitting stockcars out at will.

Pick #1 Chase Elliott, 12-1. He won here last year, coming off momentum from winning last week and sitting on the pole setting the new track record.

Pick #2 Kyle Larson 20-1. Average finish of 8th at Dover, two second places finishes and top 5 speed in practice and qualifying. Look for this to be the week for Larson to turn his season around.

Pick #3 Kevin Harvick 4-1. Kevin has two Dover wins one of them coming in the spring race last year, 16 top ten’s in his career. By this time last year Harvick already had three wins and has none this year so I think hes hungry.

Pick #4 Jimmie Johnson 20-1. Pretty obvious pick here even if he hasn’t been up to his expectations the last two years hes made progress all year. Fastest in second practice, just outside of the top 10 in qualifying but the important numbers are 11 wins, 17 top fives, 24 top 10s no one has ever raced the Monster Mile better than JJ.

Pick #5 Martin Truex Jr. 8-1. Two wins at Dover and top 4 finishes in four of the last five races there. He won the last race that was under 1.5 miles at Richmond and was second fastest in second practice.

Underdog pick #6 Daniel Suarez 50-1. His performance in Stewart Haas has been better up to this point than it was at Gibbs and in four starts at Dover hes never finished outside the top 10. Maybe it’s the weekend for Daniel’s first win.

Sundays race is almost garunteed to be cancelled because of weather however that doesnt really change or affect my picks when the race actually happens on monday.

-Bones

Saw that One Coming

May/1/2019

Or better yet saw those three goals coming. Good God does it suck to love Liverpool. Messi is a God and he has smighted this team straight back through the earth. One day just maybe one day Liverpool will win the Champions League or the Premier League, not in my lifetime but one day.

-Bones

What’s Cooler than Winning a Race?

Aprip/27/2019

Winning one hundred grand on top of it. Which is exactly what Tyler Reddick did today at Talladega winning the 3rd of 4 Dash 4 Cash races. Only made possible by a masterful display of blocking.

Now an extra 100k might not sound like big money to the normal sports fan that sees all of these athlete salaries but this isnt part of their salary. This is just cold hard cash, extra walking around money. Someone thing as like the bonus someone gets for making an all star team. Someone like Christopher Bell has said he will use his 100 grand winnings to jump start his own dirt racing team. Reddick will probably throw a couple extra bucks to his crew and throw one hell of a party tonight for his team.

Side note, go Gray Gaulding, driving an underfunded team to a second place finish has to feel special. Also that Panini car looks bad ass.

-Bones

Damian Lillard Might Be the Coldest Motherfucker of All Time

April/24/2019

After all the shit talk, all the physical back and forth, Dame Lillard has put the entire Oklahoma City Thunder organization in his back pocket. What a fucking shot. Just dropping dick in front of the entire arena. This is what the playoffs are about.

This is clearly the issue with Russel Westbrooks triple doubles. How many games does he win with these stats? It didnt matter at all tonight. Especially since he couldn’t even cover Dame on the most important play of the game. Maybe, just maybe Russ is bad and might be stat hogging.

-Bones

Easter Egg Hunts Should be Nationally Televised

April/21/2019

There are certain looks in sports that just let you know you’re in trouble. Jordan in the last 30 seconds of a game, Tiger on the first tee, Brady in the fourth quarter. But above all of those comes the blood thirsty look of a small child in front of a field full of colorful, candy filled eggs.

Let’s be honest, much like how Christmas has evolved into simply the day where I get to open presents, Easter has evolved into the day where small children will ransack a village if there is the slightest chance they might find an egg. I’m here for it and I would watch it on TV. Who wouldn’t watch little kids box eachother out, bite and scratch for the hope of a quarter inside a plastic egg. There is a level of panic and excitement I dont think anyother sport can match in a span of five minutes.

It’s the perfect event, everybody wins! Either you kicked ass and got a ton of eggs or you didnt give enough and parents just start taking them from their kids and giving them to you. Or no one took pity on you and you still have more candy than you did six minutes ago. Nothing becomes more focused and tunnel-visioned than a 7 year old on the hunt. Kid lost both shoes, dont care got eggs. Went back to the wrong family, dont care got eggs. Left a wake of other children crying behind them, dont care got eggs. On this day your child would trade your life to find just one more egg.

Took my kid four days to pick up six toys of the floor but 100 eggs spread out in a field? Gone in 3 minutes max. I think some of these kids have super powers. Much like how some pigs can smell out truffles, I believe some kids can smell money. Last year we put out close to 200 eggs for 5 kids, 11 of them had money in them. My daughter found 10 of the 11, MVP of Easter Sunday.

Coming to the Ocho next year “Little League World Series of Easter Egg Hunting.” Tune into to see who can take home the golden egg. Which all the kids will toss aside since theres no candy inside.

-Bones

Go Colorado Avalanche

April/20/2019

Fuck the experts, fuck Johnny ham and cheese, even if the the Avs beat the Flames in 7 games it wouldnt be expected. I am so happy for this team and Nathan MacKinnon. What a team to overcome another team that had an extra 17 points more than you in the regular season.

Go Avs, Go Avs, Go Avs that’s all I’ve got to say. I know we can only go as far as MacKinnon takes us, but I am here for the ride.

-Bones

Put Some Respect on Ken Jennings’ Name

April/18/2019

Theres a new kid on the jeopardy block, breaking some record winning some cold hard stacks but let’s not act like hes the new goat.

This James Holzhauer fella seems like the real deal and is taking a new approach to the game however it’s only been 10 days. Ken did this shit for two and a half months. Jennings almost beat the IBM robot, and has over 2.5 million in winnings, Holzhauer may be on pace to crush that number in half the days but the odds arent in his favor.

Holzhauer already has the second most winnings on the all time list, which means this shit is rare. Let’s also not forget Ken Jennings is the only person to go over 20 days in the shows 35 seasons. Turns out trying to prove you’re the number one big brain, against other big brains is really hard.

The one thing I will give James is he can say he went 40 for 40 which is an incredible flex. You can say you had a triple double or even that you had a 20 and 20 game but nothing sounds better than I had a 40-40 game on jeopardy. Making a 131k in one hour isnt a bad racket either. What a coincidence in what might be Alex Trebeks last season it gets exciting again and has national media attention, real fishy.

-Bones